Go Gentle - A Different Journey


Go Gentle

I have always loved teaching ‘Do Not Go Gentle’ by Dylan Thomas. In his poem, Thomas exhorts his father to fight against death, to ‘rage against the dying of the light’ and not to ‘go gentle into that good night’. I have used this poem in countless lessons to encourage my students to live a life that pushes the boundaries. Being part of my own father’s journey to the heights has given me a new perspective.

Unlike Thomas, as I sat with my father in his last days, I was able to undertake a gentler journey with him. My father was a complicated man, I have described him in poems as the ‘thundering god of my childhood’, as an enigmatic ‘question mark man’. I was afraid that the end of his journey would leave me with too many unspoken conversations, too many regrets. But Dad, who was always a fixer of things, was able to fix one last thing.

He left me with a deeper understanding of what it means to be able to let go well.

There are many things in life that I have had to let go of: parents, siblings, relationships and places. What hurts most is trying to hold on, it’s like grabbing a rope as it’s pulled through your hands, the burn is caused by the holding on.

That’s not to say that endings don’t bring pain. The pain is profound. Perhaps, though, I have found a grace in remembering  that the nature and purpose of journey is to move towards an ending. As I turn to look back over the path travelled, my power is in choosing what I will take with me on the next stage and, even more importantly, what I will leave behind.

I choose to go gentle.

Comments

  1. Anonymous17 June 2012 at 10:24

    Ruth thank you for this. This is so true and I had a difficult but loving relationship with my Dad but he taught me many things. As time has passed I see the beauty of him and learn to leave the less beautiful behind, Thanks XXX
    Nicki

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous18 June 2012 at 02:13

    Thank you for sharing RUTH, i could relate to much of this.
    Much Love always.
    Claudine.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Denis Wright31 July 2012 at 04:37

    I have always thought hard about this poem. As you know, I have fighting my own battle for some time now; one that I know I will not win - and yes, we can all say that given that we will all die. It's not the same thing.

    But speaking from the inside, there is one thing we who in the end face insurmountable odds have the right to - the time to stop raging against the dying of the light; to be allowed to stop struggling to draw breath and yield as peacefully and with as much dignity as we can, and not held to be weak or selfish when that time comes.

    Denis

    deniswright@blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous2 August 2012 at 15:39

    Dear Ruth,
    Thank you for sharing your writing. Thank you for sharing your life. You truly are a blessing. This reflection mirrors my sentiments on my father's passing, only that I, unfortunately, was unable to have been with him in the end. I love your sense of humor and razor wit. What a pity I was in the wrong year at high school and missed out on the privilege of being in your class. I do however recall much mirth when you were our hockey coach :D.
    Cheers
    Nicolette (Sikiotis)

    ReplyDelete

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