Fatter Than Life


Start your heart-dance. 

Fatter Than Life is a poem about living ‘juicy’, about living a larger life. It was written at a time in my life where I felt lost and trapped in both my inner and outer worlds. We probably all have those days where – even in the middle of the brightest day – it feels like midnight in your soul.

The hook for the poem came one beautiful Karoo morning, driving that straight, long road back to Johannesburg from the Cape. There was my tall African sky that I love so much, carrying a silver and grey cloud formation called a holy mackerel sky. I loved the unusual name and it began to dance in my head as the road unrolled. The name and the clouds had a lift and a joy that I was searching for.

I have been a big person for most of my life. I was sent for ballet lessons – once. I came home knowing that if I was ever going to star in a ballet it would be as the Lake and not the Swan. But I don’t have to wear a tutu, or in my case, fourfour, to know how to dance with my heart.

Heart-Dancing is about letting go, it’s about hearing a rhythm and letting your heart follow its beat. Dancing is about showing up on the centre stage of our lives and waiting for that moment when the spotlight hits.

Dancing, on those midnight days, is about having the courage just to get up in the morning. Dancing with your heart as your partner is about knowing the steps even when others tell you that you’re out of synch. It’s about not leaving your hopes and dreams in the wings while you watch other people dance your steps.

Am I a perfect dancer? No. But there are days when I feed my heartbody with the defiant rumbleroar that’s me!
And that’s brilliant.

Leave a comment if you can help someone with their Heart-Dance, or if you just want to chat about yours.

Keep dancing,
Ruth.

 Fatter Than Life

One day when it’s not midnight,
I’m gonna dance under a holy mackerel sky,
I’m gonna jitterbug my bellybody in defiant:
Fatter than life
Got no rhythm
Can’t stop me now,
Space jumps, jetês and absurd arabesques.

One night when it’s burning bright midday,
I’m gonna love off the fat of the land,
I’m gonna feed my heartbody in a defiant:
Fill this space
Heap my plate
Can’t stop me now
Can’t laugh me now,
Enormous rumbleroar that’s me!
                                    Ruth Everson

(This poem remains the intellectual property of the poet.)

Comments

  1. Olga17 October 2011 at 12:40

    What a beautiful poem...And by the way we are not big people, just people who are too short for their weight!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Lydia Craemer18 October 2011 at 04:52

    is your profile picture the holy mackerel sky ? I love those evenings when the sun sets on high clouds and they turn iridescent

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ruth Everson18 October 2011 at 13:15

    Hi Olga - I love living in my wide world.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ruth Everson18 October 2011 at 13:16

    Nuisance: No this pic was taken of a sunset in Mauritius last December. It's a great reminder of a beautiful space.

    ReplyDelete

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